Lens of History: 14 (?!)

STEC Archives, Print Document Division
Curator signature: Jer
Format: Textual Record
Object: Collection of assorted memos addressed to Cmdr. Mike Yin
Location (if known): Presumably Mike’s Office…
Time (if known): All Memos are dated November 1st.

Below show items 1 to 10, out of a list of 185.

Memo no. 1 is a generic form filled out by an elegant hand in cursive.

NOISE COMPLAINT – RESIDENTIAL

DETAILS: Excessively Distasteful Halloween Music from Residential Block C

DESCRIPTION: This is NOT a noise complaint; this is a complaint RE someone’s HORRID tastes in music. Thriller is like, so, a decade ago. C’mon! Get on with the times!!!

Memo no. 2 is a generic shipgirl requisition form, printed.

Requisitioner Info:

Date: October 29th
Department: INTERNAL USE
Shipgirl: Yorktown Sisters

Delivery Location: STEC Shore Depot 4B, to be delivered to Avalon Base Dock #41

PO#: 45458468952341548

Purchasing notes: Additional Goodies for the Halloween Party, yay!

Item Number Unit Price Total Cost
5 lb Candy Corn Value Bag, Resealable 5 9.99$ 50$
Assorted Grab-Bag, Halloween Candy, Dehoff’s Key Market Brand, Family Size 2 15.99$ 32$
Apples, Assorted 10 lb .75$ 8$
Decorative Edible Sprinkles & Caramel 1 2.99$ 3$

Memo no. 3 is a generic shipgirl requisition form, printed. The requisition form has a very large DENIED stamp on it in addition to a small note below.

Requisitioner Info:

Date: October 29th
Department: INTERNAL USE
Shipgirl: Chester

Delivery Location: I’M ACTUALLY NOT SURE

PO#: THE USUAL ONE WE USE

Purchasing notes:

Item Number Unit Price Total Cost
Bull Halsey’s Fighting Ready-to-Pop Popcorn, 8oz, Limited Halloween U.S. Navy Edition (With Collectible Sticker – One for Each Ship!) 65000 1.00$ CRUISER GIRLS DON’T NEED NO MATH

The note that came with memo no. 3 says:

No.

A reminder that we still have cratefuls of that Tanuki-brand ramen you bought two months ago. You want the stickers, you eat the popcorn. Bring the empty bag to me and we’ll buy the next one. No ifs, buts, or other comments.

Jer

Memo no. 4 is a complaint, non-official.

Mike,

Do something about Flora. I caught her trying to rip the DD girls off again selling overpriced last-minute Halloween candy. While I am an ardent supporter of capitalism, what she is doing is flatly unethical. These are barely young adults for heaven’s sakes. I’m not going to watch her pocket their hard-earned cash like this.

I have confiscated her stock of candy in the meantime and returned the money to their respective parties. Please take care of this at your earliest convenience. Thanks.

Best regards,

Pennsy

Memo no. 5 is a complaint, non-official.

Commander,

Like, not cool! I found Florida trying to rip off some of the girls in base. Should have figured she was the one who cleared out the canteen’s candy stocks. Really puts things into perspective with how those one percenter think, huh?

You gotta talk to her. This just isn’t right. She doesn’t even eat candy! She’s just doing it to mess with people. As such, I’ve brought her candy back to the depot. Good thing I caught her before she could peddle her wares, right? We’ll figure out chargebacks and whatnots later.

Sanny

Memo no. 6 is a beautifully printed thank-you card, Hallmark Brand

We had a great time. Thank you for organizing the Halloween party!

Signed,

Maury & the DD girls, on behalf of the entire base

Memo no. 7 is a routine restock/resupply form. In a shaky hand, it reads:

Beer supply running low due to drinking game @ Halloween night. Please get the cheap stuff and not the craft brews that Helena likes so much. I swear while I agree with sis’s tastes in liquor and wine I can’t stand her beer…

Memo no. 8 is a clipping of what seems to be an exchange on Usenet, along with commentary.

…I tell ya it ain’t right. Something’s definitely going on in the middle of the ocean. It’s either the navy’s new warships firing something or it’s something completely out there I tell ya…

Commander. It is my opinion that the little ones might have gone a bit overboard with their fireworks display. A living, morphing, dancing and laughing jack-o-lantern in the sky is acceptable. However, it is my recommendation that it be displayed away from possible observers. Certainly it was unsuitable given our proximity to the Californian coast.

Mahan.

Memo no. 9 is a standard time off/shore leave form.

An unremarkable and very mundane form used more for record keeping purposes than anything else. The form is complete, already signed by Cmdr. Yin, but remain incomplete.

The signature of the shipgirl (New Jersey) is currently missing.

Additionally, the boxes around the dates have been crossed out multiple times, with the latest being “November 2nd to November 5th.”

Memo no. 10 is a slightly dog-eared maintenance request form. The request form is completed and signed by four shipgirls (Arizona, Oklahoma, Raleigh, and Pensacola).

Just want to say that we set the water slide Halloween theme park up and it worked great. Turns out fairies are super handy – the entire sector was warm as a mild summer day! However, the heater we used ended up making weird noises all day. Figure we’d submit a maintenance request just in case!

Stapled to the maintenance request form is approximately 16 pages of parts requisitions, with a note attached.

Mike! This is NOT how you’re supposed to use that prototype nuclear submarine reactor that I’ve designed. Please get whoever is in charge of getting me replacement parts pronto if you want me to make the December assessment deadline.

Also, it would be NICE if they invited me for a change! I know I’m in the lab all the time and all but Cusk needs her fun too, okay?

 

Lens of History: 13 (?!)

STEC Archives, Digital Document Division
September 8th, 1989

Correspondence no. 103
Sender: New Jersey, Shipgirl
Recipient: Michael Yin, Commander NBA

Mike,

I hate to be anti-fun and all, but there’s something that you should probably be aware of. Please see file attachment below and let me know what I should do.

I found this poster plastered all over the hallway next to my office along with an oversized banner. The banner says “FREE ANTI-ABYSSAL MIND CONTROL PROTECTIVE HEADGEAR – JER APPROVED – GET YOURS FOR FREE TODAY – INQUIRE WITHIN.”

(I know what this is in reference to, by the way. It’s in celebration of our recent anti-mental interference program’s success. We don’t have a name for it yet, but we MIGHT as well call it TINFOIL at this rate.)

I’m not against Marby doing her thing and all, but people here take ideas from our shipgirls very seriously. The potential for Abyssal units to mentally dominate or influence our men IS a valid concern (hence why we even embarked on that project in the first place).

The problem is that with the recent slew of television “documentaries” and talk-show radio discussing matters of various new-age bullshit I’m a little worried about people actually taking this seriously. I took the posters down but am a little unsure as to how to proceed. On one hand, I really don’t want to draw attention to it through sending out a base-wide announcement. At the same time, these posters have my face on it, so …

Maybe I should say something.

Thoughts?

Correspondence no. 205
Sender: Leon Harris, USMC
Recipient: New Jersey, Shipgirl
cc: Michael Yin, Commander NBA

Morning Jer.

Some of my men have been wondering about uh, some very creative solutions to protective gear. I figure I oughta ask since I got fooled by Marby before. This one her tricks? The aluminum hat?

Correspondence no. 217
Sender: U-552, Shipgirl
Recipient: New Jersey, Shipgirl
cc: Michael Yin, Commander NBA; Marblehead, Shipgirl

Tinfoil doesn’t block out anything! If anything it AMPLIFIES the effects!

Proven by German science! I’ll even attach the paper!

Correspondence no. 227
Sender: Marblehead, Shipgirl
Recipient: New Jersey, Shipgirl

I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WATCHED “Secret Alien Overlords: The Plot to Take Over Earth and How You Can Resist” too!! Doc Z JUST talked about the special properties of tin foil. Says it can block out mind-control beams from the evil Alpha Centurians’s MIGHTY FLYING SAUCERS.

You should have put the requirements on the poster too. Apparently you’re supposed to bless the hats by putting them in the microwave and superheating them for a good five minutes and fifty-five seconds. It’s because according to ancient revelations the number five symbolizes the defenders of earth and their five elements. So

Correspondence no. 229
Sender: Marblehead, Shipgirl
Recipient: New Jersey, Shipgirl

Wah, Jer, sorry my connection cut off for a second and the message sent itself.

Anyways, so you have to realize that then the secret to being

[MESSAGE TOO LONG FOR DISPLAY PURPOSES (56203 characters exceeding the displayable character limit for this program. To access the full contents of this message please log in on STEC’s historical archives]

Correspondence no. 301
Sender: Michael Yin, Commander NBA
Recipient: U-552, Shipgirl
cc: New Jersey, Shipgirl; Marblehead, Shipgirl

…There’s an actual paper on this?

And yes, go ahead. Jer. Sorry. I’ve had my hands full all morning.

Correspondence no. 339
Sender: New Jersey, Shipgirl
Recipient: Marblehead, Shipgirl

Um, thanks for the very detailed explanation for the TV show. I haven’t watched it but with your explanation I probably don’t have to, haha.

You didn’t make the poster?

Correspondence no. 440
Sender: Marblehead, Shipgirl
Recipient: New Jersey, Shipgirl

Wait I am confused now. You haven’t watched it at all? Not even the pilot episode?

Of course not! In fact I’m kinda sad that you’d think that I couldn’t tell apart fiction from reality…

I’m sad now. Thanks a lot.

Correspondence no. 495
Sender: Essex, Shipgirl
Recipient: Michael Yin, Commander NBA

Have you seen my posters? The ones that Weavy and I were working on? We were planning a pirate-themed party. They’re fairly cute cartoonish styled ones with every shipgirl but in pirate hats.

Let me know if you find them. I’m missing my metallic paints, too. But that I probably just misplaced.

Correspondence no. 1003
Sender: U-552, Shipgirl
Recipient: Michael Yin, Commander NBA
cc: New Jersey, Shipgirl; Marblehead, Ship

Of course! German science is best in the world!

Correspondence no. 8904
Sender: New Jersey, Shipgirl
Recipent: [Mailing list: Avalon base]

I have discovered and apprehended the troublemakers and pranksters that created a misleading poster.

Appropriate disciplinary action has been meted out with due justice.

Please be considerate next time. Thanks.

Jer

Lens of History (12)

STEC Archives, Print Document Division
Curator signature: New Jersey
Format: Archival Records
Object: Archival Records, 84th Congress & Commentary from Dwight D. Eisenhower
Location (if known): Walter Reed Army Medical Center
Time (if known): June 29, 1956

 

To the Congress of the United States:

Our unity as a nation is sustained by free communication of thought and by easy transportation of people and goods. The ceaseless flow of information throughout the Republic is matched by individual and commercial movement over a vast system of inter-connected highways criss-crossing the country and joining at our national borders with friendly neighbors to the north and the south.

Together, the uniting forces of our communication and transportation systems are dynamic elements in the very name we bear – United States.

The Nation’s highway system is a gigantic enterprise, one of our largest items of capital investment. Generations have gone into its building. Three million, three hundred and sixty-six thousand miles of road, travelled by 58 million motor vehicles, comprise it. The replacement cost of its drainage and bridge and tunnel works is incalculable. One in every seven Americans gains his livelihood and supports his family out of it. But, in large part, the network is inadequate for the nation’s growing needs.

In recognition of this, the Governors in July of last year at my request began a study of both the problem and methods by which the Federal Government might assist the States in its solution. I appointed in September the President’s Advisory Committee on a National Highway Program, headed by Lucius D. Clay, to work with the Governors and to propose a plan of action for submission to the Congress. At the same time, a committee representing departments and agencies of the national Government was organized to conduct studies coordinated with the other two groups. All three were confronted with inescapable evidence that action, comprehensive and quick and forward-looking, is needed.

First: Each year, more than 36 thousand people are killed and more than a million injured on the highways. To the home where the tragic aftermath of an accident on an unsafe road is a gap in the family circle, the monetary worth of preventing that death cannot be reckoned. But reliable estimates place the measurable economic cost of the highway accident toll to the Nation at more than $4.3 billion a year.

Second: The physical condition of the present road net increases the cost of vehicle operation, according to many estimates, by as much as one cent per mile of vehicle travel. At the present rate of travel, this totals more than $5 billion a year. The cost is not borne by the individual vehicle operator alone. It pyramids into higher expense of doing the nation’s business. Increased highway transportation costs, passed on through each step in the distribution of goods, are paid ultimately by the individual consumer.

Third: In case of an atomic attack on our key cities, the road net must permit quick evacuation of target areas, mobilization of defense forces and maintenance of every essential economic function. But the present system in critical areas would be the breeder of a deadly congestion within hours of an attack.

Fourth: Our Gross National Product, about $357 billion in 1954, is estimated to reach over $500 billion in 1965 when our population will exceed 180 million and, according to other estimates, will travel in 81 million vehicles 814 billion vehicle miles that year. Unless the present rate of highway improvement and development is increased, existing traffic jams only faintly foreshadow those of ten years hence.

To correct these deficiencies is an obligation of Government at every level. The highway system is a public enterprise. As the owner and operator, the various levels of Government have a responsibility for management that promotes the economy of the nation and properly serves the individual user. In the case of the Federal Government, moreover, expenditures on a highway program are a return to the highway user of the taxes which he pays in connection with his use of the highways.

Congress has recognized the national interest in the principal roads by authorizing two Federal-aid systems, selected cooperatively by the States, local units and the Bureau of Public Roads.

The Federal-aid primary system as of July 1, 1954, consisted of 234,407 miles, connecting all the principal cities, county seats, ports, manufacturing areas and other traffic generating centers.

In 1944 the Congress approved the Federal-aid secondary system, which on July 1, 1954, totalled 482,972 miles, referred to as farm-to-market roads–important feeders linking farms, factories, distribution outlets and smaller communities with the primary system.

Because some sections of the primary system, from the viewpoint of national interest are more important than others, the Congress in 1944 authorized the selection of a special network, not to exceed 40,000 miles in length, which would connect by routes, as direct as practicable, the principal metropolitan areas, cities and industrial centers, serve the national defense, and connect with routes of continental importance in the Dominion of Canada and the Republic of Mexico.

This National System of Interstate Highways, although it embraces only 1.2 percent of total road mileage, joins 42 State capital cities and 90 percent of all cities over 50,000 population. It carries more than a seventh of all traffic, a fifth of the rural traffic, serves 65 percent of the urban and 45 percent of the rural population. Approximately 37,600 miles have been designated to date. This system and its mileage are presently included within the Federal-aid primary system.

In addition to these systems, the Federal Government has the principal, and in many cases the sole, responsibility for roads that cross or provide access to Federally owned land–more than one-fifth the nation’s area.

Of all these, the Interstate System must be given top priority in construction planning. But at the current rate of development, the Interstate network would not reach even a reasonable level of extent and efficiency in half a century. State highway departments cannot effectively meet the need. Adequate right-of-way to assure control of access; grade separation structures; relocation and realignment of present highways; all these, done on the necessary scale within an integrated system, exceed their collective capacity.

If we have a congested and unsafe and inadequate system, how then can we improve it so that ten years from now it will be fitted to the nation’s requirements?

The obvious responsibility to be accepted by the Federal Government, in addition to the existing Federal interest in our 3,366,000-mile network of highways, is the development of the Interstate System with its most essential urban arterial connections. I have signed H.R. 10660 today for the purposes below.

1. That the Federal Government assume principal responsibility for the cost of a modern Interstate Network to be completed by 1964 to include the most essential urban arterial connections; at an annual average cost of $2.5 billion for the ten year period.

2. That Federal contributions to primary and secondary road systems, now at the rate authorized by the 1954 Act of approximately $525 million annually, be continued.

3. That Federal funds for that portion of the Federal-aid systems in urban areas not on the Interstate System, now approximately $75 million annually, be continued.

4. That Federal funds for Forest Highways be continued at the present $22.5 million per year rate.

5. That Congress be authorized to prioritize any special highway projects immediately pressing, including that of the Strategic Highway Network.

DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER

[Mail Call] 2017/08/20 – Shipgirl powers

ARE FARY ENERGY HAMON?

Or some variant of

Are shipgirl powers magical in nature?

Or something like

Can ordinary humans be augmented to become shipgirl-like in terms of strength, agility, etc?

The answer to all of the above is that shipgirl “powers” fall under none of the above.

First, the “aura” or “shield” in which each individual shipgirl projects is something that’s innate. Think of it like a passive skill in RPG games. It’s always on and always active. Certain shipgirls – mostly that of the BB girl equipment type – can extend this protection and cover their allies with it. This appears to be either a cultivated power, or an equipment-based power (STEC isn’t quite sure which is which). So far, STEC narrows this down to some sort of fairy energy/force based mechanism of action. They’ve done some tests on this and have some idea about how it works. Example, here.

What is infuriatingly confounding to STEC researchers is that the display of certain shipgirl powers are not nearly as consistent. For instance, take your patellar reflex test. If a shipgirl possess extraordinary strength, then the doc’s really in danger of having something (like the clinical walls or a body part) kicked in, right?

Except, if you put a shipgirl on a stool and tap her on the knee with your handy reflex hammer, you get a very mundane and ordinary reflexive response. Ask her to kick the wall down and she can do just that.

What’s more, if you just look at this from pure biology, it doesn’t add up. Shipgirl muscles aren’t denser than an average human. There’s no special material or midi-cholorian mitochondria or whatever that sets them inherently apart from an ordinary person. You can take a shipgirl’s full medical records to a doctor and they’ll just tell you it’s a healthy female at the pinnacle of her health. Really. That’s it. Nothing extraordinary about it.

But, of course, shipgirls are capable of more than just that. Researchers in-universe generally think it’s got something to do with the nature of fairies, the energies that fairies emit (that certainly enables for say, miniaturization of matter and technology), and the process of which shipgirls “appear” in Pacific.

Is it magic? Well, some shipgirls can literally conjure flame as a part of their power set. We’re talking about spontaneously generating an open flame. That’s pretty “magic” – but there’s no ritual involved, no esoteric knowledge, and no ability to teach this ability to other shipgirls, much less people.

Then you have things like Edsall’s tendency to be followed by ghostly P40s that not even the fairies can communicate with. Is this magic? Is it just an illusion? If so how can mere illusions kill Abyssals?

Shipgirl powers are as a whole, complicated business. It doesn’t make things any easier when some get a kick out of trolling STEC researchers.

See you next time.